#005- Processing Change

(Where I've been... and everything else)

Hello, I’m Gaurav. I hope you remember me.

There were 1000 people when I left, and there are 1000 new when I’m back.

(If you’re new here, you might want to read this first). So, the first thing I want to do is thank you for being a reader. I’m very occasional with my words here and it can get a little annoying for you guys… so thank you for being patient with me as well.

I’ve been meaning to write this post for about 6 months now, but never actually found the will to sit down and write. The reasons for running away from something are many. One of them is the unwillingness to process change. Processing a change can be just as hefty as the change itself, for your mind does not know the difference between experiencing something and simulating it.

Life’s changed. A little in the beginning. Then a lot. The details are something I’d like to keep to myself, but almost everything significant in my life has seen a significant change.

The above is a scene from a movie BladeRunner 2049. The entire purpose of this image is to make this post look consistent with my other posts (it also looks cool tbh). There is no context or reference to it. That’s all. Enjoy the rest of the reading.

From my finances to my relationship. From working in a business to working on one. From not having much clarity to knowing exactly what I want out of life. Not everything can be listed here and I wouldn’t like to speak than necessary, for the job to process all this is mine and not yours.

It’s funny how a man tries to avoid the eyes every time he faces a mirror. Specially as he ages.

I tried my best to avoid the eyes too but how long can one run away from himself? And for what?

If you’re going to have to do it eventually, what’s the delay for?

Anyway.

What does all this mean for you?

It means that I’m back. I’d been putting off my posts trying to process everything but now that I’ve let off the steam I can finally get back to writing. I’d been wanting to do this for so long but I’d been struggling to sit still with my thoughts and accept mortality. Of things and of people.

Anyway… I’ve drafted some posts, and I will be scheduling them to be released in the coming weeks. I hope you find them just as valuable as before.

See you in the next one.

Thank You.

(If you have the means, support my work here.)